How the hell are you supposed to write about an instrumental? Guess we’re about to find out. I’m talking about the main combat soundtrack of the crazy ass game called Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy. This is the song that plays when the invaders come and attempt to kick your shit in. Considering how often it played throughout the game you’d think I’d be tired of it, but nope. I’ve grown quite fond of this energetic and enigmatic soundtrack. Enough to write a blog post about it evidently. So if you’ve got any interest in reading about an instrumental you can follow along.
(For the record this isn’t the only blog post I’ve been working on but it’s the shorter one that can come out quicker so here we go)
What’s this? another review from Spartan? That’s right folks, here’s part 2 of my Haunt the House series, this time we’re tackling Terror Town. This is a game that I’m not familiar with, as I wasn’t able to play it on Armor Games or any other free flash game website. But thankfully, the collection allows me to play it whenever I please. As always I’ll be going for the best possible rank with no deaths, but if you saw my previous review, you’ll know that it isn’t easy to do that.
Every journey has a destination, and what one would encounter on the way is entirely up to chance. When I started this set of trades with Mr. Cosmia, I did so with noble (albeit) selfish reasons. Back then, I wasn’t as connected with people who shared my interests as I am now, and just wanted to share what I thought was a good game series. And on some level, I believe Mr. Cosmia thought the same. But then FromSoft games started getting into the mix, beginning with Bloodborne.
Full disclosure for those expecting a lighthearted review that will praise this game and the developers who made it a reality: you are going to be sorely disappointed for I have made it no secret of my animus towards these types of games. Dark Souls was the progenitor of the souls-like genre, games that put you in a world with little resources and expect you to conquer enemies that can shred your health bar in seconds if you’re not careful, and bosses with often very cheap tactics that can kill you even faster. They are the definition of “Get gud” games, where you are expected to win by learning patterns, adapting to situations and overcoming obstacles after several attempts. Occassionally, you are thrown a bone by the developers, be it new weapons, upgrades to your limited healing item or other things to “help” you. Often, the games employ alternate paths (a closed gate for example) near where you enter the enemy infested area. Pulling a switch on the other side of the gate will open it, and allow you to avoid the enemies you had to get through to get to it. But make no mistake, for you’re still feeble enough that the random dog can take you out if you’re not careful.
These games are a popular pastime for those who enjoy a hard challenge, but I am not one of those people. If I wanted Mr. Cosmia to try a lengthy game, 5/10 times a FromSoftware game was going to be given in exchange and many days of suffering would endure. But ultimately, I prevailed thanks to the leniency of Mr. Cosmia, who didn’t expect me to platinum them and get every ending. “Just get to the end” was the aim of the game, and that’s the bar that I set out for. But I then began to realize that FromSoftware is just going to keep pumping out harder and harder games that I’d inevitably have to play in the trade. So I did what I always do, I bargained. I’d play whatever FromSoftware game of Mr. Cosmia’s choosing, and that would be the final one eligible for the trade. After I finished it following the traditional checklist and required bosses, that would remove any souls-like game from being elligible in the future of the trade. It was down to either Elden Ring or Sekiro, and I ultimately went down the latter option. So here we go, the one for all the marbles. This round of the game trade I will be taking on Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice for the PS4.
It’s that time again where I make a certain Spartan play a game and then he makes me play a game and then we both write lengthy blog posts ranting about our respective games. This time around I sent him on a brutal shinobi quest in Sekiro, and he wanted to make sure I struggled through something as well. His solution? The widely acclaimed indie roguelike based on Greek mythology known as Hades. Climbing out of Greek-Hell That Isn’t Actually Hell but Still Looks and Acts Hellish at Times is tough work y’know?
This situation reminds me of a certain video I’ve seen. It involves two women engaged in particular activities. One woman acts frustrated and proclaims, “I’m trying to punish you, you’re not supposed to like it!” The other woman continues to quietly oblige, not looking particularly bothered.
Usually I keep mentions of my kinks to a minimum in these reviews, but this game’s not entirely unrelated. Particularly this idea of a punishment that’s enjoyed. It gets at the heart of what makes a game like this work. So unlike the other woman, I have quite a bit to say about my purported punishment. A whole review’s worth.
Hello folks welcome and/or welcome back to the Game Trade Reviews. Where I play a game upon a certain Spartan’s request in exchange for making them play one of my things and then we both yap about it. The Game Trade Reviews have been going on for quite some time, predating this whole ass blog’s existence. I could not tell you how many we’ve done total, but I can say this marks the 5th one I’ve done for this website. 5 is a special-ish number. So for such a special-ish number let’s talk about a series near and dear to my heart: Pokemon.
I’ve been a fan of Pokemon for a long ass time. I still remember when I got my hands on Pokemon Sapphire for the Game Boy Advance when I was like 4 or some shit. I couldn’t even read yet but I was still enthralled. I was so into it that my parents regretted giving it to me and took my whole Game Boy away. It was a losing battle.
Pokemon was very much my shit in elementary school, still a solid interest in middle school, and it’s a big part of how I bonded with my closest friends from high school. Including a certain Spartan I do these reviews with. Would the Game Trade Review exist at all without Pokemon? Perhaps not. So it’s only fitting that a Pokemon game get featured in it. But wait a second, why is this game part of the Game Trade? If I love Pokemon so much wouldn’t I want to play this game unprompted without ever needing it featured in a trade? Well… there is a reason. Stay tuned and I’ll explain all about that, and how my experience went with this whole ass game. I’ll also be covering the Teal Mask and Indigo Disk DLC. So much shit to talk about yeesh. Welp, let’s get into it.
If you’re a gamer/In the Know you probably heard that FromSoftware recently released a new DLC for Elden Ring. Other companies may have handled the DLC by giving you a few more weapons to play with and the option to put Ranni in a swimsuit. I might’ve been okay with that, but FromSoftware decided to basically give us a whole new game instead. Shadow of the Erdtree’s map isn’t quite as big as the base game, but it’s still quite massive. So much so that it took me three months to complete it. I wouldn’t call my playtime entirely representative, but the point remains that the DLC turned out bigger than most expected. I poured a lot of time into Shadow of the Erdtree. So now I’m going to use this blog post to share my thoughts on it. The short version is that I mostly liked it. The long version? Well…
Hoi folks! Spartan here with yet another review for the time honored Game Trade, where Mr. Cosmia gives me something to play/review and vice versa. Let’s see what we’ve got today, really hoping it isn’t a FromSoft game…….
Oh, Night in the Woods, perfect! I live to see another day without having to put up with Dark Souls level difficulty of combat. I remember reading about this in a GameInformer magazine once and how it tackles a college dropout returning to a small town where not much goes on. I didn’t drop out of college but I live in a small town so this will be a refreshing perspective to me.
Welcome back to the Game Trade Reviews, where I post my in-depth takes on whatever random ass game my friend wanted me to play. This time around I’m taking a look at a game that got a rerelease pretty recently, Pikmin 2. I played Pikmin 3 on the Wii U almost as soon as it got released, and I adored it. For whatever reason I never went back to try the older games until this opportunity arose. I still haven’t played the first Pikmin game, and it’ll be some time before I finish Pikmin 4. As such, I won’t focus too much on comparing this game’s quality in the context of the series. Not to say I won’t bring up any comparisons at all, but I will do my best to evaluate this game on its own terms. I must also mention that this review will contain spoilers, though this is not exactly the kind of game where spoilers matter that much. With all that out of the way, let’s get into it.
Been a while since I’ve posted on Mr. Cosmia’s blog eh? guess it’s time to change that. It’s Spartan for those who don’t realize this yet. Gaming has been a large part of my identity and I can’t imagine my life without it. If I didn’t pick up that PS2 controller back in 2007 and stick with it as a hobby, who knows where I’d be? certainly not creating this post as gaming is what led me to meeting Mr. Cosmia in the first place. But even with the positive benefits of gaming, there are some certain, scummy aspects to it that have become more prevalent in recent years. And one of those is pay-to-win games.
Hi I’m back, I’m done with grad school. Got a degree and shit. Pretty cool. Remember that Nintendo Direct where they announced Pikmin 4? Some of you might not have watched that at all. So Shigeru Miyamoto’s telling us he wants to tell us some stuff about Pikmin. That’s promising right? Yeah it was, Pikmin 4’s coming out this month. Good shit. But before there was Pikmin 4 there was an explanation of Pikmin Bloom. They gave us a mobile game before Pikmin 4. If it weren’t for the announcement afterwards I would have bitter feelings towards the game. I probably wouldn’t have tried it. Fortunately, I got my Pikmin 4, or the anticipation of it. I couldn’t resolve that anticipation with Pikmin 4. Instead I could give Pikmin Bloom a shot right away. I never got into Pokemon Go! yet I went for Pikmin Bloom. How did I get taken in so thoroughly? Let’s get into it.
Cosmia 